Ten Things More Terrifying Than a Second Joe Biden Term

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If you’re reading this, you’re probably not a Biden voter; let’s be honest, not many progressives, liberals, and Democrats (but I repeat myself) spend a lot of time at RedState. They should – they might learn something – and I sincerely hope they do, as that would mean we’re reaching people in desperate need of good information. But we’re a partisan site, and as such, appeal to a partisan audience, for the most part.

Granted the possibility of a second Biden term may not warrant too much concern yet – the election is shaping up to be a brutal one, and the odds of old Joe making it to the finish line; well, let’s just say that I wouldn’t bet the deed to the ranch on it.

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Even so, it’s safe to say that most of the readers here find the prospect of a second Joe Biden term in the White House downright unsettling. But there are worse things; I know it can be hard, at times, to imagine ten things more horrifying than a second Biden term, but I can make a few suggestions.

So, without further ado:

  1. Being forced to listen to Kamala Harris read James Joyce aloud for an entire day. Now this is a two-fold horror; if you, like me, were required to read James Joyce at some point in your education then you, like me, probably came away baffled at the Irish author’s sometimes incomprehensible prose. Now, imagine that, read aloud by the current Vice President, with the occasional pauses for cackling laughter.
  2. Remembering that Joe Biden is all that stands between us and “President Kamala Harris.” This may be more horrifying than you might think at first, given Joe Biden’s ongoing physical and mental deterioration. And one suspects that, in the world of today’s Democratic Party, once the “first woman of color President” is in place, those being the only traits that they care about, she will be hard to dislodge.
  3. Living anywhere along the border with Mexico. Granted this is mostly Biden’s fault, or at least, the fault of whoever is really pulling the strings behind Joe Biden. Our southern border seems to be growing more and more dangerous by the day, and while this is coupled with the Biden Administration, it’s arguably more dangerous to be in plenty of places along the border than in, say, Fargo, North Dakota.
  4. Being a woman competing in a women’s sport in the NCAA. For details, speak to Riley Gaines.
  5. Bernie Sanders suddenly realizing his ambition of gaining the Democrat nomination for President and then winning the election. Do you think the current crop is bad? Wait until the daffy old Bolshevik from Vermont gets his hands on the levers of power. This is a guy who still thinks the Soviet Union was a hell of a good idea, and would like to repeat all those failures (including, presumably, the gulags) here.
  6. Being in a Zoom call with Jeff Toobin. Worse, being interviewed in person by Jeffrey Toobin.
  7. Being the Health and Safety Inspector in a Chinese EV battery factory. Or in pretty much any Chinese business.
  8. SMOD, or “Sweet Meteor of Death.” We’re talking about an asteroid impact like the one that wiped out the dinosaurs. That would be… bad.
  9. Spending the weekend in a remote cabin with Hillary Clinton. Not only is the prospect of two days in the sole company of Her Imperial Majesty Hillary I, First of That Name, Dowager-Empress of Chappaqua daunting all on its own – bear in mind that she wouldn’t stop talking about herself the entire time – there’s always the possibility that if you could offend her and suddenly find yourself Arkancided.
  10. Being eaten by a grizzly bear. Bears are formidable animals. A griz may weigh 5-600 pounds, they are tough, fast, and aggressive. You can’t fight one unless you have a seriously powerful firearm, and you sure can’t outrun one. You can’t hide from their incredible sense of smell, which would shame a police bloodhound. To try to explain that: Consider that, when you have a pizza delivered, when it arrives, you smell the pizza. If a bear was standing next to you, it would smell each component of that pizza, sausage, mushrooms, pepperoni, each different kind of cheese, the crust, the box, the ink on the box, the delivery man’s clothes, his shoes, his after-shave lotion, the shaving cream he used that morning, and the air freshener in the car he is driving. So, when it comes to bears, you can’t run, you can’t fight (unless you are prudently armed), and you can’t hide – kind of like a second Biden term.

It’s always tempting, these days, to say hopefully that “…things couldn’t get worse.” But remember, when that statement is uttered, Worse has a way of showing up and saying “Hold my beer.” So it’s good to remember that, yes, things could get worse. 

Let’s just cross our fingers and hope they don’t.

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